holding steady.™

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i am the total black (thanks, audre lorde). i write about everything, especially music, the web, politics, photography and other things not included here. also, this site just looks better in safari.

a moveable feast and other miscellany

for about the past month, my girlfriend and i have been fake fighting about when i will next come out to see her. i am happy to submit that the fight has concluded, and i am going out to california for the second time on may 22 (aka 55 days from now).

in other news, i have finally completed the upgrades i made to my computer (which included a 320gb hard drive, and a 4gb memory boost)/. the hd took a little bit of time, as i didn’t initially realize that i could simply use the “restore” function in disk utility to copy from the old disk and create a bootable disk out of the new one. i fiddled around with what felt like five superduper! backups, and yelled at my time machine-enabled time capsule for not just doing what the fuck i wanted. lots of yelling. but all is well.

i have plans to go to the gym in a few. i’m up early (even for me) because for some unfathomable reason, i went to sleep at 3pm and woke at 11. i’m feeling somewhat refreshed nevertheless.

also, a cute surprise: i’m putting the phone i bought for Girlfriend in the mail today. since she has verizon (god.) she’s getting the voyager, which i’m eager to fiddle with and understand. she’s a big fan of teasing me for liking technology, but she’ll appreciate it when i know how to use her phone before it ever gets to her.

the odd couple, the newest gnarls barkley album, has been sitting in my itunes library for a little over a month (piracy rules), but i’m just now giving it a good listen. i put it in a playlist with imani coppola (the black and white album), koop (koop island) and hot chip (made in the dark).

not too much cohesion to this post, there’s probably going to be another one later.

Playlist

this is more random than i am used to coming from myself…

i’m currently listening to the 5 stars playlist in iTunes. this really has no relevance to anything at all, but the best song to play in the past hour is quite likely feist’s “mushaboom (k-os remix).”i have been listening to an awful lot of feist lately. i have noticed that she is a favorite among many of my lesbian friends, at least those who are well-infused into the indie scene.

gomez - sweet virginia

i really don’t understand what has been going on lately. at some point, i think i told myself that this section of my site would be explicitly not for all the emo-rambling that i do on pssssst. but then, i probably thought about it, and realized that i do very little of that. so maybe this will be the catch-all. i’ll probably migrate some of the old entries over, and then maybe i’ll disable the account. it was becoming somewhat of a nuisance to me.

side thought: i am a really big fan of words. and quotes. i should do a post of some of my favorites. nah, i’ll probably just try to incorporate some into every single entry. for example, and this is one that i just read tonight: “I gave up the thing I loved more than anything, and I’m trying to get it back.” i can’t imagine that there are a lot of people who are so easily moved. reading this line, in conjunction to listening to the last minute and a half or so of “sweet virginia,” are really striking me. i suppose it has something to do with the actively morose strings, underlaced by a distinctly escalating piano chord, and the whispering of the reeds hitting the snare drum, and the notion of loss conveyed in those words, coupled with a desire to negate that loss. i told you, i make emo look cheery.

marvin gaye and tammi terrell - ain’t no mountain high enough

brian fennell - colors

i’m mildly distracted by updating photos to my gallery. it’s reasonably relaxing. crap it, i have to be up by seven tomorrow morning, if i plan to be a person at all and work out in the morning. and i HAVE to do it in the morning, or it will be a nightmare trying to work out around the football players schedule. guh.

sam cooke - a change is gonna come

so, recently i’ve picked up some tv shows. i should be appalled and my sensibilities are usually far more advanced than to be entertained by paltry and feeble acting. but i have to say it. i fucking love south of nowhere. the whole spashley drama….let’s start by saying that one of the main actresses affiliated with the show, one mandy musgrave, is absolutely adorable.

beck - e-pro

grand national - joker and clown

kilowatts - close the door

at this point, i’m kind of just embracing the notion of sleep before three am with a sublime ease that would usually come from being high. in my case, from listening to kilowatt. my relationship with music is multi-layered and organic, unquenchable and inexplicable, a dash of heat to an otherwise rather ordinary and lukewarm existence.

who am i kidding? in the past year, i have lived five lives. when you migrate into a new crowd of people, you usually have some sort of adjustment period. last summer, i had an adjustment kick in the ass. and then fell face forward into sandy depths.

dixie chicks - the long way around

i saw the dixie chicks documentary. and sort of a little bit fell in love with them. not enough, as a friend of mine pointed out, to make me go out and buy their album. but i did torrent it, and about seven of the songs are on this playlist. that’s my real indication of how much i like an artist. did i download your entire album? well then. speaking of which, i need to get the new transmission update. apparently, now i will be able to select files withing a torrent to download. i was used to this before i made the move to mac about four months ago (please don’t think me a neophyte, i have been obsessed for years. since probably the eighth grade), because i used utorrent, which is the best torrent client i used on a windows machine. i like transmission, but this was a glaring omission in terms of features, so i’m really glad they’ve gotten their act together.

enya - carribbean blue

does anyone else think enya is absolutely flipping amazing? my father used to listen to her stuff a lot when i was younger, so i have all these pleasant childhood memories that flood my brain when i listen to her or seal. we have a rocky and sometimes unpleasant relationship, my father and i. but whenever i can take the time to listen to this, i can remember a time when that wasn’t the case. this song came on earlier tonight, and i sent my dad a text telling him that i remember the best moments of my childhood with enya. he told me that it had the same effect on him, that he remembered the best things about his daughter when he listened to them. that really did make me cry. and fuck me if i’m not crying again.

ok, that’s probably a sign to quit. but i’ll leave a couple of thoughts…

would anyone want it? - think about it as an abstract

it’s no accident many accuse me of conducting public affairs with my heart instead of my head. well, what if i do? those who don’t know how to weep with their whole heart don’t know how to laugh either. - golda meir, one of my personal heroes

please explain to me the scientific nature of the whammy. - special agent dana scully, the x-files

the saddest part of a broken heart isn’t the ending so much as the start
the tragedy starts from the very first spark, losing your mind for the sake of your heart - feist, let it die

mae - summertime (”…driving away, leaving it all behind…”)

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  • feeling like barney.

  • the only time that my commute to UM takes exactly one hour is when I'm early. otherwise, it always runs over.

  • Miami has the nerve to offer "free public wifi" all over downtown. what they don't tell you as that you need a note from God to connect.

  • kind of a tricky situation, when you think you're ready, and then you find out....no, not so much.

  • one day, my ex and i are going to have a conversation about how she never told me that she could fucking sing. like whitney-in-the-90s sing.

  • those who speak, don't know. those who know, don't speak.

  • getting used to a new kind of solitude.

  • there is only so much satisfaction that a person can get out of sitting in their house for three days in a row.

  • this evening, i discovered that transmission is capable of showing download speeds in MBs rather than KBs. holy. shit. i. heart. lossless.

  • "i want to be like water. i want to slip through fingers but hold up a ship."


  • del.ici.ous



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